The reactions of a child to a PCS move vary depending on their developmental age, personality, and how long they have been doing it. The inquisitive ones will ask the question “why” from start to end. The socially adjusted ones will look forward to meeting new friends. There are children who wouldn’t show any emotion at all and there are those who will resent all the changes.

Through all these, you are the constant factor in your children’s lives. Thus, the ability of your children to adjust would largely depend on your resilience and ability to help them through the process. What happens when you are having difficulty in handling the changes? How can you be of help to your children?

Understanding the Challenges of Your Children

A PCS will always be an emotional experience for you and your children. Saying goodbye to everything familiar is hard, no matter how many times you go through it. The moves become more trying as the children grow older and as they build ties and relationships in the school and neighborhood.

Studies show that military children tend to perform lower in school. Many would go through five to nine schools by the time they finish high school. In a way, so may feel that life is a blur with constant movement with everyone and everything just coming and going. Nothing and no one stay long enough to be deeply stamped in their being.

Understanding Your Own Challenges

As a military spouse, you expected the constant moving and you accepted it as a fact of life, yet there may be grief that lingers for a while each time you make a move. You don’t let it show because your family needs you to be strong, but you are also going through a roller coaster of emotions, just like your children. Leaving behind relationships and a promising career hurts you. The prospect of new things is also daunting you.

To adjust, you learned not to invest emotions into your relationships and job, and to live for the moment. To continue being the stabilizer for your family, you keep your own feelings bottled up. But how long can you do this? The pressure may make you less effective as a parent to your children who look up to you and your strength during PCS moves.

Help Yourself

You can’t perpetually hold everything together, especially when you are as anxious or overwhelmed. To be an effective parent to your children, you need to help yourself first. Fortunately, finding help through counseling is easy these days. If you find yourself challenged with the responsibilities of a military parent, call Carolina Counseling Services – Fayetteville,  NC. An independently contracted, experienced therapist is available who will listen and guide you during these trying days. They can help you face your emotions as well as guide you to be an effective parent, so you can support your children in the best way you can.