Reintegration: What a Military Spouse Should Know

You start the countdown as your husband/wife’s deployment comes close to its end. The coming home is a happy occasion. After the long wait, you look forward to happy days. The first days after the return can indeed be a happy reunion, but maybe not for long.

After the return, you may notice that things haven’t turned out the way you expected them to. There can be changes, which may distress you. Rather than be distressed, consider taking the matter in a more proactive manner. Consider making adjustments with help from a therapist.

Reintegration: What is it?

The stage following the celebratory return of the military to his/her home is called reintegration, a process that is usually fraught with much emotion. As the festive mood wanes off, and as everyone tries to get back to old routines, the stressful adjustments begin, not just for the soldier, but for everyone.

While the safe coming home makes you happy, there are challenges that both of you may eventually face. For a brand new military spouse, you may soon discover that the routine and the decision-making process have to change. Reintegration for many service men and women may get more complicated as children are born and as they grow up.

Get Real: The Challenges are Not Over

Reintegration can be challenging since deployment changes each of you individually and collectively, and also because you both lived by different rules. You may have difficulty relinquishing your authority because you are used to making all the decisions by yourself. You are likely to continue doing so out of habit. Your children may continue to seek your approval for everything because that’s what they have been doing all the time.

In this scenario, your spouse may have difficulty fitting into a family that has learned to live without him/her, despite your conscious effort to make your spouse a part of your (and your children’s) life. Repeated deployments and reintegration may not make things any easier around the home, especially when the growing children become major components of reintegration.

Adjusting With Effort and Help

For a non-military family, these challenges may sound trivial. But considering all the adjustments that military spouses and children have to experience again and again, these are “major issues” as these affect their lives in some significant way. Don’t expect that all the pieces to miraculously fall back into place; you need to work on the adjustments.

No one said it will be easy, but it is doable if you will seek professional assistance from Carolina Counseling Services – Fayetteville, NC. Independently contracted counselors with experience in guiding military families during reintegration can help! The right therapist can assist in making the experience of reconnecting a beautiful experience for you, your partner and the children.

Related Articles: