It may be difficult to predict how military children will react to the news of a permanent change of station (PCS) move. This may be something they have come to expect at any time, yet, it may stir emotions with thoughts of leaving a place where they are comfortable and happy. This may be a welcome change if the child is unhappy in their current school or neighborhood. It can be difficult to know how your child is feeling, though changes in their behavior can be an indicator.

What the Behavior is Telling You

Behavior is a non-verbal way of communication. For children who often struggle with fully expressing their thoughts and emotions, their behavior can speak volumes. Adults can often benefit from being mindful of a child’s behavior in order to help them handle the transition.

If your child takes your news with little to no emotion, it may mean, “Here we go again.” It is possible that your child expected it, though it is also possible that this may not be the case. Silence does not always indicate acceptance. Your child may have tried cope in the past by not developing close friendships, which may contribute to such a reaction and may be cause for concern.

If older children question the move and engage you in an argument, this may lead you to concern or to wonder whether they will have difficulty adjusting. Children that are reacting in such a way may just be venting out their frustration or sadness related to having to leave friends, teammates etc.

Your child may retreat to their room, slam the door and refused to eat or go out. Younger children may just look around during the discussion, they are perhaps confused. You may wonder whether the move will affect them as much as the older children.

The Changing Behavior

Moving can be tough on adults, and it can be even tougher on the children. Many military children have successfully adjusted to the challenges of
PCS. Those who did so successfully often times became incredibly resilient teens and adults. Though, before they get there, they may have needed a bit of help along the way. Studies have shown that approximately 30 percent of military children show signs of distress after multiple PCS moves.

The news of a PCS move may startle your children, even when you have prepared them for the possibility. Each child will likely process this information differently because each child is unique. Their behavior may change from the time they receive the news to the time you reach your new address. The whirlwind of activity related to moving may divert their attention to the tasks at hand. Once you get to your new location, there may be obstacles to overcome and adjustments to be made.

Finding Your New Normal

There is no single indicator that will predict how children will behave over the course of time; this can depend on a multitude of factors. What can be helpful is to note the changes in your child’s behavior and to talk to them, allowing you the ability to have a better understanding of how they are feeling and thinking.

It may also be beneficial to be guided by a counselor from Carolina Counseling Services – Fayetteville, NC. With the expertise of a licensed, independently contracted therapist, you and your child can learn to accept, adjust and welcome new hopes and opportunities. Call today and begin your family’s journey toward resiliency.